Online Peer Editing

Here are the comments I left for my tablemates' rough drafts...

For Colin,
Overall it is good and answers basic book review #4 well. First of all I would like to say cite your first quote, what page is it on? When you say you like his style and how he shows the whole family kind of hating on him, it makes less wonder in the plot. Less wonder for what will happen next? Also, I would like to know more about how Dave's life reflected on "IT"s cycle of stealing and punishment.
For Elton,
Dear Elton, First, Maybe you could introduce the book before going straight into the book review question you will talk about. I think you went into describing characters, who they are, and what they did, after talking about the style. I would like to know more about the style of militaristic strategies it gives. Is it for the game? Or are these strategies for war?
For Mercedes,
First, I'd like to say, maybe shorten the summary at the introduction and quickly summarize it to move onto the basic book review questions. Relate, telling the age of the characters, to style. I would like to know more about how you can only see half of the world the author has created. Make the weakness clearer.Is it weak because they do not revisit each other?
For Aleah,
What personality(s) of Savior are you focusing on? Because, in the third paragraph, it is mostly about Harlem and her dad. Prioritize the character you are analyzing. Write about one character, or the relationship between two characters. I'd like to know more about the relationship between savior and Harlem, because, you have a quote that shows Savior leaving, only with the support of Harlem. (-pg39)